In doing research for this year’s Horrorshow, I’ve found that many flicks featured on SOV horror lists on the tubes are not, in fact, shot on videotape. Usually, they are movies that were made for the home video market, never intended for theatrical release, but were shot on cheap film stock. Such is the case with Things, the 1989 flick from producers and writers Barry J. Gillis and Andrew Jordan, with direction by Jordan. It was transferred to video for release, but was shot for the most part on super 8.
I can’t mince words. Things is a contender for worst movie ever made. Everything about the film is the lowest of low rent. Color, lighting, dialogue, plot, acting, special effects, music — it all lives in the darkest, deepest levels of incompetence. Yet, it is not a film hostile to viewers. It has a charm that’s lacking in something like Birdemic. This is an inept film made by earnest filmmakers. While it is bad, it is also worth appreciating the hard work from those involved. They gave us something to be laughed at and mocked, yes, but the enjoyment of a bad movie is not all schadenfreude.
The film follows three men, in what was probably Andrew Jordan’s apartment at the time of filming, as they drink lots of beer, wander around the house a bit, and occasionally fight off the be-teethed things of the title. Where did the things come from? Doug (Doug Bunston) and his wife, Susan (Patricia Sadler) have been trying for a baby, and enlist the services of Dr. Lucas (Jan W. Pachul). Rather than deliver a healthy baby, the things claw their way out of her abdomen and go on a tear through the home. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: Things”