I remember the first time I saw The People Under the Stairs. I grew up in Akron, Ohio, in a neighborhood called Highland Square. The hub of the neighborhood was a stretch of Market Street that was a collection of storefronts and small businesses. By the time the 1970s rolled around and American cities turned into rancid shitholes, just about every other business on this stretch of road was a bar. There was a joint called The Bucket Shop. It had an informal slogan, ripped from an old Arlo Guthrie tune: you can get anything you want at The Bucket Shop... anything. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: The People Under the Stairs”
Month: October 2013
October Horrorshow: The Stuff
Some films have a premise that is promising, but then little works in execution. Such is the case with The Stuff, Larry Cohen’s sci-fi/horror/mystery/comedy from 1985. The problem with The Stuff isn’t that it tries to be too many things. The problem is that it just can’t do anything right. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: The Stuff”
October Horrorshow: Critters, or, Power of the Night!
I don’t think I’ve seen this movie since the late 1980s. That’s almost thirty years of depriving myself of big hair, a pack of unstoppable, ravenous fur balls that are more teeth than animal, and Power of the Night, the number one single by Johnny Steele. Oh yeah, this was the decade I grew up in, with all its foibles, bad fashion, and shit music. This was the decade that put Eric Clapton in pastels and convinced teenagers everywhere that synthesizers were an acceptable accouterment to rock music. And my God, Reagan was in the White House. No, no, no. If it weren’t for the amazing run of substandard cinema throughout the decade, I would want to have the entire time wiped clean from my memory. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: Critters, or, Power of the Night!”
October Horrorshow: The Conjuring
Filmmaker James Wan has, in the last decade, become horror cinema royalty. He was behind the creation of the Saw franchise, the two Insidious movies, and, from just this past summer, The Conjuring. His bona fides as a horror auteur are unassailable...which must be why he’s currently helming Fast & Furious 7. After directing three straight ghost stories, maybe a change in direction was inevitable. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: The Conjuring”
October Horrorshow: My Bloody Valentine
The town of Valentine Bluffs, Nova Scotia, has a problem. Despite being deep in the heart of Canada, only two people in the entire town seem to have wicked accents. Apparently, the native population has been replaced by a bunch of pod people from the Toronto area, or even possibly the States. The local sheriff is doing nothing. They may have already gotten to him! Continue reading “October Horrorshow: My Bloody Valentine”
October Horrorshow: DeepStar Six
What a putrid mess. But, I’ve been watching far too many good or passable movies of late (ha!). I needed to get back in the shit. Once a person gets into shitty movies they can’t stay away for long. The world stops making sense. Things seem to slow down and speed up at the same time. Knowledge begins to lack clarity, begins to fade, and taken to its extreme, all that’s left is a blank stare into the abyss. It’s not pretty. Thank goodness DeepStar Six was there to save the day! Continue reading “October Horrorshow: DeepStar Six”
October Horrorshow: World War Z
The October Horrorshow has been a little thin on zombie flicks this year. This is only the third zombie flick that’s made the cut (four if one were to count Resident Evil: Retribution, and I do not). This is also the best of the bunch. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: World War Z”
October Horrorshow: Dracula (1979)
I’ve seen hundreds of horror films. And I’ve seen more Dracula films than I can either count or name. But until recently, I had no idea that this version of the oft-filmed tale existed. This Dracula is so lost to the digital history of cinema that when I searched for it on IMDb, I had trouble locating its page. I have a hard time understanding why.
Perhaps Dracula has been adapted for the silver screen so many times that there is a sense of fatigue surrounding the character. Certainly, once a viewer latches on to a particular film as their favorite, only a morbid fascination with the character would compel one to dig through the continuously growing pile of Dracula films looking for a hidden gem. But that’s precisely what this Dracula is.
From 1979, this Dracula is an adaptation of both Bram Stoker’s novel and a stage play that ran on Broadway. Reprising his role from the play is Frank Langella as Dracula — a tall, rugged charmer with a gigantic mane of David Copperfield hair. Alas, the 1970s. Director John Badham helmed a film that is quite a compression of the novel, but it’s also very lean. I can only guess that this leanness is a result of the film using a stage play as part of its source material. The necessities of film and stage require that a story with the scope and breadth of a novel has to be trimmed down to fit very real budgetary and physical constraints. The play, being a successful production, probably got the bulk of that work out of the way, leaving the film free to breathe back out a bit on what the play sucked inwards. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: Dracula (1979)”
October Horrorshow: The Haunting (1999), or, Think of the Children!
When I imagine Purgatory, I have a fairly concrete vision in mind. I’m standing on a New York City subway platform during the morning rush hour. It’s August. The heat is stifling, and I had a twenty-minute walk just to reach the station. By the time I find myself standing in the stagnant air, waiting for the next train, I’m pouring sweat. During the night, some bum defecated on the platform and its ripe smell has been added to the unique bouquet of rot and brake dust that gives the New York subway an odor all its own — truly something unique the world over. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: The Haunting (1999), or, Think of the Children!”
October Horrorshow: The Navy vs. The Night Monsters
What a putrid mess. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen a cheap 1950s monster flick. They have a certain amount of kitsch to them that paid quite a lot of dividends back in the decade of above ground nuclear tests and Leave It to Beaver. Stylistically non-offensive but at the same time strangely subversive, a good monster flick can be a commentary on the creeping destructiveness of American power, the precarious balance of post Word War II peace, and the boring homogeneity of typical Hollywood cinema. All of this can be contained in a film that looks like it cost about five bucks to make. Yep, 1950s monster cinema was great.
Too bad The Navy vs. the Night Monsters was made in 1966. Continue reading “October Horrorshow: The Navy vs. The Night Monsters”