October Horrorshow: Trollhunter, or, The Troll Hunter…Whatever

Trollhunter movie posterI have to admit, I’m getting pretty sick of found footage horror films. The technique was unique for only a small handful of films, but it crossed into gimmick very quickly. I don’t seek out these films. To prepare for the October Horrorshow, a lot of times I’ll just grab whatever is currently popular for rent or whatever has made a splash in the last few years. This has led me to watch Quarantine, Grave Encounters, The Last Exorcism, Paranormal Activity, Apollo 18, Cloverfield, Diary of the Dead, The Tunnel, REC, many, many others, and now, Trollhunter.

These days, watching so many found footage horror flicks is a bit like being a connoisseur of fast food burgers. Sure, there are some good ones out there, but you have to shove down a whole lot of big macs and junior whoppers in your quest to find one. Flashes of grilled perfection are found in too few breaks in the normal routine of noxious, artery-clogging, commodity fare that does naught more than fill both bellies and graves. Real love and care are not just offset, but dominated by the work of hucksters who would prefer a person not think too much about how they are feeding both mind and body. Why would a person subject themselves to this? Dear reader, I do it for you. I do it...for you. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Trollhunter, or, The Troll Hunter...Whatever”

October Horrorshow: The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia

The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of GeorgiaIf someone were to guess where this movie takes place, there’d be a fifty-fifty chance they’d get it right. Is it Connecticut or Georgia? Well, let’s analyze. The film is called The Haunting in Connecticut 2, subtitled Ghosts of Georgia. Going in, knowing nothing about the film, I inferred that it takes place in Connecticut, but the characters, or possibly whatever ghosts are causing the haunting, have roots in Georgia. Maybe there’s a plot that has something to do with the Civil War or the Underground Railroad. Not exactly original, but logical.

But another, cynical way of thinking is that the film takes place in Georgia, and has absolutely nothing to do with Connecticut; that this sequel is attempting to cash in on a brand. The original Haunting in Connecticut wasn’t a blockbuster, but it was profitable. And Hollywood loves profit. Lionsgate had this successful property on their hands, and they were looking to squeeze it dry. Rather than put any time and effort into a serious sequel, they chose to slap the Haunting in Connecticut title on some low-rent production they had set to run, in the hopes of making some cash. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia”

October Horrorshow: Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)

You don’t see this often, but Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark is a remake of a TV movie from 1973. I’ve never seen the original, but apparently it has a decent reputation in the horror world. Anyway, it has enough of a good reputation that Guillermo del Toro decided to write and produce the remake (Matthew Robbins shared screenwriting credits). Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)”

October Horrorshow: The Awakening

The AwakeningThe Awakening, from 2011, is better than most horror films I’ve seen. It’s also one of those films featuring the supernatural that doesn’t quite fit all that well into the surprisingly rigid definitions of the genre. Films like The Shining, The Sixth Sense, and others, are horror films by default, when in actuality, they rise above such rote classifications. The Awakening is not in the class of the two films cited above, but it has the same aspirations to break away from the bonds of genre.

Directed by Nick Murphy, and written by Stephen Volk and Mr. Murphy, The Awakening follows Florence Cathcart (Rebecca Hall), a young woman in England a few years after the end of World War I. She’s Cambridge-educated and has fiercely-held beliefs. Among these are the equal status of women and the ridiculousness of belief in the supernatural, including belief in God. She’s the author of a widely-read book that purports to debunk the supernatural, and the viewer’s first experience with Florence is her doing just that. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: The Awakening”

October Horrorshow: Paranormal Activity 3

Paranormal Activity 3 movie posterThe only way to kill a movie franchise is to look away. The business model of the film industry necessarily requires that films display a certain amount of histrionic personality disorder (after all, if it ain’t worth looking at, it ain’t gonna make money), but eventually all franchises end up wearing out their welcomes. Narcissism, egocentricity, etc.; a person could have a field day going through the DSM looking up conditions that apply to the film industry, but it all gets back to money.

The Paranormal Activity franchise is a cash machine of unheard of proportions in Hollywood. To date, budgetary expenditures of around thirteen million bucks have resulted in three-quarters of a billion dollars in box office receipts. Holy shit. That’s actually quite amazing. And as long as people keep showing a willingness to go see the same movie over and over again, Oren Peli and company would be fools to stop satisfying the desires of the moviegoing public.

None of this means the movies have to be any good, of course.

Paranormal Activity 3 is the most recent of the series that I’ve seen, and truth be told, there is little different about this film than the first two, and probably the fourth, as well, which I have not seen. Writing a review for this film is a bit of an exercise in futility. Like the film, it would be mostly interchangeable with any review of the earlier films. I could write a brief summary of characters and plot, but in considering doing so, I’m being confronted by a strange feeling of hopelessness. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Paranormal Activity 3″

October Horrorshow: The Last Exorcism Part II

The Last Exorcism Part IIAs moviegoers, we’ve been spoiled rotten this past decade. When a good movie is released that makes a pile of dough, the studios have been more than happy to invest money in a sequel, or two, or three. Unlike the days of Hollywood past, these latter-day sequels usually measure up to the original. Sure, there are still dogs out there, but long gone are the days of Jaws 2 and Rocky 2...and Jaws 3, and Jaws: The Revenge. The willingness of original stars and creative teams (i.e., them being contractually obligated) to retread familiar ground is a big part of this. Outdated notions of artistic integrity don’t stand a chance with all that potential money flying around. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: The Last Exorcism Part II”

October Horrorshow: Mama

MamaThe last horror flick I saw with Guillermo del Toro serving as executive producer was The Orphanage, from 2007. I reviewed it in last year’s Horrorshow, and while I did like it, I lambasted it for its derivative nature. This time around, the film del Toro chose to attach his name to is Mama, from writer/director Andres Muschietti. It’s also a fairly derivative horror flick, in that there’s not much happening on screen that will be all that unfamiliar to horror fans, but unlike The Orphanage, I couldn’t find any quotes online where the director is being a pretentious ass, so there’s that.

Mama tells the story of two lost little girls and the ghost that loves them. Beginning during the financial crisis in 2008, a businessman played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau goes on a murderous killing spree (thankfully off camera). He kidnaps his two young daughters and flees the city for the countryside. After a car accident, the trio are lucky to survive, and they seek shelter in an abandoned cabin in the woods. There, Nikolaj is about to finish off his bad day by killing his daughters, but a spectral apparition inhabiting the cabin gets to him first, saving the girls’ lives. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Mama”

October Horrorshow: Christine

A general rule: films that are adaptations of books are not as good as the book. Why should they be? A film removes all the grace of prose, and by necessity compresses the story. Sometimes, though, films are better than their source material, and the rule is reversed. Jaws, Wolfen, Die Hard (aka Nothing Lasts Forever), Full Metal Jacket (aka The Short-Timers)...a list like this could go on and on. It’s strangely satisfying to watch a film that’s better than the book. But also confusing. All those films I cited above come from mediocre books. Yet the mind of a filmmaker was able to read them and think, “Yeah, this would make a good movie.” Okay. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Christine”

October Horrorshow: Carrie

How times have changed. Within two minutes of Brian De Palma’s Carrie, an adaptation of Stephen King’s first novel, there’s a scene in a girls’ high school locker room after gym class with no less than half a dozen full frontal nude shots. High school girls (all played by adults) are bouncing around and giggling after showering, showing off their gloriously naked bodies. I can’t imagine there would ever be a film made today that featured nude teenagers so prominently, much less with such sappy eloquence and, yes, sexuality. It’s not long before the camera pans and settles on the film’s main character, Carrie White (Sissy Spacek), as she showers and caresses her body, culminating in a horrific display of bullying after the onset of her first menstrual cycle. That’s how viewers are introduced to the confused, introverted, oppressed, overgrown adolescent of the title: as she is brutalized by her peers. Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Carrie”

October Horrorshow: Poltergeist

So, who really directed Poltergeist? Part of the Hollywood mythos the last few decades treats this as an open question. Was it Tobe Hooper, the man at the top of the credits? Or was it producer Steven Spielberg? It was such a serious concern among the Directors Guild that they launched an investigation into whether or not Spielberg had tried to snatch credit away from Hooper. Honestly, no one involved is saying definitively one way or the other, but Hooper is a competent storyteller with fine directorial vision, and I can’t see him having a film taken away from him. That being said, it’s also hard to picture Spielberg letting a director that was not him have total creative control over a flick he was very much involved in as producer. So did Spielberg direct Poltergeist? Who knows, and who cares? Continue readingOctober Horrorshow: Poltergeist”