The first line in my notes for Phantom Brother, the 1988 shot-on-video (SOV) horror flick from screenwriter Joseph Santi and director William Szarka reads, “Well, it’s trash.” That may be harsh, but my movie notes are written in the heat of the moment, without considering the trials and tribulations of the filmmaking process. Of course, like so many other low budget projects, Phantom Brother is a movie made despite the mountain of barriers that had to be overcome. It is a movie of passion, persistence, and…it’s trash. I’m glad it got made, but this is an obscure movie for a reason. Many reasons, in fact.
The movie opens with a voiceover. A family, with the exception of the narrator, was killed in a car crash. The father never trusted banks, so the family finances are hidden somewhere in the family’s home, now abandoned, derelict, and supposedly haunted. Two couples make their way to the house for some raucous teenage sex. As happens in many slasher flicks, two of the lovebirds (Norman Siopis and Cheryl Hendricks) are killed mid-coitus. Another (Gabriel Bronsztein) goes to investigate and meets his brutal end, leaving only one survivor, Jill (Mary Beth Pelshaw).
Viewers also meet Able Evans (John Gigante), the sole survivor of the family car wreck, and the narrator. Since the accident that killed his family, Able has been raised and adopted by the Hickman family — four brutal, filthy redneck stereotypes who are only interested in Able for the rumored fortune hidden in the house. They don’t do much about it other than follow Able on his daily trips to the old house. Why does Able go there? 
Because the house is not, in fact, haunted. Able was not the only survivor of the car wreck. His brother survived, as well, and now hides in the house, clad in a hood and mask. He’s not alone. For some reason, he is joined by the Fat Lady and the Scout (Jo Milroy and Nora Maher), who we see during the first onscreen murder. Able brings food and supplies to the house every day, and cleans up the corpses every night.
Meanwhile, Jill, who never actually saw the corpses of her friends, believes they have just gone missing, and enlists Able’s help to find them. Meanwhile meanwhile, drunken Dr. Vinnie Van Dam (Patrick Molloy), of the local insane asylum, is shocked to learn that a patient with the last name Evans, suffering from an incurable and violent psychosis, has been released from the asylum. Dr. Van Dam now tries to track down the patient, Dr. Loomis-style.
That’s a lot of plot for a crappy slasher flick. This flick needs it, though, as the body count was light. It was so light, in fact, that Szarka throws viewers a bone in the middle act by introducing some more characters whose only purpose is to get killed, and have no impact on the plot whatsoever.
So far, Phantom Brother seems like serious business. But it’s not. This flick is a horror comedy. At first it tries going for satire, then some flat jokes, finally descending into improv sketch comedy, where exaggeration and overacting are a substitute for humor. There are brief moments where the movie threatens to become absurdist art, like something from John Waters’ more mischievous days, but it never quite gets there.
SOV horror is a particular flavor of b-horror, and it is not for everyone. Being a fan of bad movies is a prerequisite, as expectations of quality are destined to remain unfulfilled. What SOV fans are looking for is a certain charm, which this flick has, and a certain outrageousness, which this flick does not have. There are no rules when it comes to SOV horror except those imposed by the moviemakers themselves. That’s where Phantom Brother is at its most disappointing. I wasn’t expecting any new ground to be broken, but I was yearning for anything that would make this film stand out from a normal slasher. Add to that the bad humor and…yuck. This one is for the SOV fans only. Phantom Brother enters the nether regions of the Watchability Index, displacing Panic at #536.