It’s been a week since I’ve seen anything in the news about Last Tango in Paris. I thought we were supposed to be outraged about that movie. That’s one of the things I hate about Twitter and celebrities. It amplifies nonsense because once one celebrity tweets their outrage, every other celebrity with a Twitter account had better join in or they look like assholes, but only for a couple of days or so. And then it’s on to the next outrage. I don’t even use Twitter, but I’m aware of Twitter outrage and Twitter wars and everything else because half the news articles on the web these days are recounts of what people have tweeted. Continue reading “Potpourri à la Lupica”
Shitty Movie Sundays: The New Barbarians, aka Warriors of the Wasteland, aka I nuovi barbari
What an incredible piece of shit. Enzo G. Castellari is my new favorite shitty filmmaker. He elevated the art of shitty filmmaking to sublime proportions. His films are cheap, derivative to the point of intellectual theft, completely shameless yet self-aware, and entertaining as all hell to the true shitty movie connoisseur. They are also films that play to the basest appetites of an audience. For example, this is the third film I’ve seen that was helmed by Signore Castellari, and in every one a character is roasted alive by a flamethrower. That’s dedication to craft. Continue reading “Shitty Movie Sundays: The New Barbarians, aka Warriors of the Wasteland, aka I nuovi barbari”
Trumpland: The Beginning of the End?
I am not a fan of apocalyptic rhetoric. We have had far too many private and public citizens welcome the idea of Revelation occurring in our lifetimes. Mostly, this nonsense was brought on by Barack Obama being in the Oval Office. His very existence was taken as a sign that America as we knew it was coming to an end. In some ways they were right. His election to the presidency was a seismic shift in the power structures of the United States, ending a centuries long monopoly on power by white men. But where one side saw his election as confirmation that the United States was a nation that embraced its future, others saw the change as a threat. The horrible words that were showered on the Obama administration for the last eight years by the ignorant, the racist, and those who sought to manipulate these groups, has been a constant shame for America. No other president since Lincoln was met with such hate by the opposition, and for what? Continue reading “Trumpland: The Beginning of the End?”
Empty Balcony: Alien Nation
There is a nasty amount of racial tension in America right now, accentuated by President-elect Trump’s impending inauguration next month. I hate that current events are affecting my perception of Alien Nation, the 1988 sci-fi film from director Graham Baker and screenwriter Rockne S. O’Bannon, but they are. Really, the filmmakers bear most of the blame, here. A huge part of the fictional universe Graham and O’Bannon crafted deals with refugees assimilating into American culture and having an effect, both positive and negative, on native demographics. Boy, I really need to find a way to flip off the politics switch in my brain when I’m watching movies. Continue reading “Empty Balcony: Alien Nation”
Half-Baked Ideas: Congressional Reapportionment
There aren’t enough members of the House of Representatives here in the United States. I know that the idea that there are not enough politicians in Washington is anathema to the current American condition, but as the House is currently apportioned, some states have disproportionate representation. Continue reading “Half-Baked Ideas: Congressional Reapportionment”
Shitty Movie Sundays: No Escape
Recently, I had a vague memory of a movie. I swore that I had seen it, way back in the dark and distant days of the 1990s. I couldn’t remember what it was called, but I was having visions of Ray Liotta running around a jungle prison and killing people. What was this film? Had I imagined it? Was it a dream? Continue reading “Shitty Movie Sundays: No Escape”
Trumpland: Living Down to Expectations
The election of Donald Trump to the presidency is only two weeks old, and already the President-elect is making clear his administration will be packed full of men hostile to the nation’s progress. Continue reading “Trumpland: Living Down to Expectations”
Shitty Movie Sundays: Escape from the Bronx, aka Fuga dal Bronx
Can lightning strike in the same place twice? Yes, it can! Escape from the Bronx, a.k.a. Bronx Warriors 2, a.k.a. Escape 2000, is the wonderfully shitty sequel to 1990: the Bronx Warriors. Coming back from the previous film are producer Fabrizio de Angelis, director Enzo G. Castellari, and star Mark Gregory as Trash. The gang’s all here! Well, almost. The Bronx Warriors was such a success for de Angelis and company that it appears he reduced the already miniscule budget for this film in order to generate a higher profit margin. At least, that’s what I would do. The Bronx Warriors had a larger entourage for Trash, and more above scale talent than Escape. Gone are Vic Morrow and Fred Williamson, replaced by one of the most recognizable That Guy faces of the 1970s and ’80s — Henry Silva.
Silva has always been great in shitty movies, and he does a great job in this film as the over-the-top mercenary Floyd Wrangler. That’s right. FLOYD WRANGLER. All caps, folks. That’s the praise Silva has earned from me for putting on the bad guy hat in this flick.
Anyway, plot. Continue reading “Shitty Movie Sundays: Escape from the Bronx, aka Fuga dal Bronx”
Missile Test Predicts! The 2016 Results
Holy fuck, America. We did it. We actually voted into the Oval Office a man who didn’t know, until he met with President Obama last week, that all the staffers in the West Wing are Democrats and will have to be replaced. We voted into office a man who hired, as his chief strategist, a white nationalist propagandist. We voted into office a man who, during the campaign, could be relied upon to disqualify himself from said office at least once a week, either through word or deed. But most importantly, America’s voting public went with most of my 2016 election gambling picks, thereby ensuring my Loyal Seven readers, who faithfully follow my advice, early and prosperous retirements. The results are below. My picks are first, with the winner in bold. Continue reading “Missile Test Predicts! The 2016 Results”
Empty Balcony: Rollerball (1975) & Rollerball (2002)
Alongside post-apocalyptic films, there exists another popular nihilistic genre of film — the dystopian tale. Civilization doesn’t have to have collapsed into a dense ball of suffering for the dystopian film to work. Rather, current mores and politics just need a little bit of tweaking and society becomes unrecognizable. Indeed, in some dystopian futures, it could be argued that humans are thriving. What is common in dystopian films is that some eroding of freedoms has occurred, brought on usually by technology, capitalism, communism, post-industrialism, or a conglomeration of every fear we have about the role of individuality in the future. Continue reading “Empty Balcony: Rollerball (1975) & Rollerball (2002)”